Monday, September 5, 2016

Rhapsody (Bellator Saga #5) by Cecilia London



Goodreads review



"I'm never going to stop loving you, Caroline. It's just not possible."

Major
Caroline Gerard returns from a dangerous mission battered and bruised. Terrified to confront the emotional and physical gap between her and her husband, she's determined to do whatever it takes to avoid reality.

Commander
Jack McIntyre has been tasked with saving American democracy, but he has to save his marriage first. He's desperate to regain the passionate connection that he and his wife once shared. And a man on a mission will sacrifice anything to succeed.

In the meantime, the rebellion is in need of a catalyst to spur international action to stop President Santos’ increasingly unstable behavior. As Caroline and Jack repair their hearts, each day brings new secrets and new challenges, and a revelation that could shatter everything they thought was true.
Rhapsody is the fifth book in The Bellator Saga. It should be read after the first four books in the series.
 


4 Sexual Healing Stars.

I Am. A. bundle. Of. Nerves. I. really. Need. A. Therapist. I’m just going to dive in and lay it all out for you without giving too much away.

I didn’t see how these two unique and individual characters could make it. Oh Monty how filthy and sweet you were before.

They would always have this. The closeness and the tears and the madness and the passion, even in the midst of great uncertainty. She would always have him. Always.

“I love you,” he whispered. “Never forget how much I fucking love you.”

Caroline survived the last mission she went on and when she woke to find Jack at her side. Again. Lucky cow.

She’d been so dumb. So stupid. So selfish. Taking that mission, hurting him the way she had. Why was he still with her?” –I ask myself that all the way throughout the book as well Caroline. For the love of God woman what were you thinking? Oh right you weren’t. But I like you Caroline so I shall forgive you.

They still have that spark it is undeniable even after everything that has happened it can’t be denied. The glimpses of who they used to be is heart shattering.
But with Caroline building up that wall up one brick at a time it is tough going but Jack is tearing down two bricks at a time. With his words of encouragement and hope.



Caroline is so lost, she doesn’t know who she is anymore. Jack is lost in the fact that he wants to help her but he just doesn’t know how. Jack has the patience of a saint and deserves a fucking medal.
Things aren’t the same as they were and they never will be. But they have to face the demons, the pain, the grief, the loss. Jack & Caroline get through it the only way that they can and that is together. But Caroline has changed so much not only on the inside but also look wise as well. Getting to the point of letting her guard down with her vulnerability.






From start to nearly finish of this series I have been fascinated with the plot of the book and to the extent of sacrifices, and the hard choices that are made. It has defined them. Their strength and convictions are admirable even with all that they have suffered and lost. Call me crazy but there is nothing more beautiful then unvarnished truths. Strong accusations were made on Caroline’s and Jack’s part and they were really horrible and cutting I actually thought the gap and the distance between them couldn’t be bridged. But it stems from guilt and whether and this is the crux of the matter. Forgiveness. Without forgiveness they both can’t move on.



Jack fights for Caroline and boy does he know how to fight for her. It’s killing him but my God Jack. Be mine, please? Yeah, yeah, it’s all about Caroline. I get it. He goes above and beyond in every, and any way possible.



But even Jack has hit his limit. But not once did he ever gave up. There was that one moment where the wrong choice could change everything. They made the right choice.



The sex was always explosive between them that was never a problem. Jack tries his hardest not to push Caroline on it but he can’t let go of the past. What left an even bigger gap is the intellectual and emotional connection they have which we saw in all the previous books. The rules of engagement have changed, with patience and unconditional love. And explosive sex let’s not forget that. They work it out.


Their love and their journey in finding their way back to one another is full of obstacles. It is a gut-wrenching, heart-breaking, soul-destroying experience for Caroline & Jack as well as for the reader.





Ms. London hits you hard with all these emotions. But yet at other times she soothes the emotionally open wounds. Stiches the heart back together and the rebuilds the soul but not all of it. This book, ah who am I kidding all the books in this series deserves the tears and each single teeny tiny bit of my soul that has been left behind when I finished it. I love her writing style. It is flawless, engaging, captivating I need and want more.



At 4 % I was feeling the waterworks hitting. It wasn’t much better @ 47% either to be honest. I felt utterly exhausted after reading and finishing the book. Even a lousy night’s sleep didn’t help either.



I wasn’t going to give it the full 5 stars no matter how beautiful their love is and how flawlessly it was written. Caroline frustrated me to no end. I understood her confusion and her pain. I felt every bit of it she felt.



I knew it Ms. London and you didn't disappoint. What an ending. 2017 is a long time away. What am I going to do? I know. STALK. PESTER. AND. BEG.